Hitsuzen
by ProjectWings
Summary: After a meeting with Hitsuzen Kurogane finally meets his true love. However when he mumbles the words 'I like you' to Fai, he falls in a sleep, slowly dying. Will Kurogane defeat the ghosts of Fai's past? Destiny or tragedy, who will win!
1. Chapter 1

Me: Kyaah first story ever! I'm so exited to finally publish things online xD Please read and review to it would really help me!  
Fai: It's a shame I'm not around for now to, I can't wait to tease Kuro-chi -giggle-  
Kuro-chi: That's KUROGANE!  
Me: Oh look Fai Kuro-chi's mad  
Kuro-wan: That's it everybody dies  
KUROGANE uses DEATHGLARE, it's super effective...

Without further ado let the story begin!  
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**Chapter one: Bus to nowhere**

'I've had it with this nonsense.' Kurogane screamed out loud. 'I never get my way around here, I always just have to listen to what you want to say.' He continued while taking his black jacket from the coat rack. 'Don't go Kurogane' Tomoyo whispered, while she took her hand to her cheek to wipe the tearstains away from her small face. 'Don't even dare to start crying Tomoyo, you brought this on yourself, you are the one that cheated on me.' 'But, but it was an accident. I didn't mean for this to happen, I swear I'll never see him again. Please…' She muttered softly, Even though he still liked her he could only glare at the crying woman in front of him. 'I need some time, you'll see when I get back.' And with that he slammed the front door after him.

The streets were abandoned, which was common sense since firstly it was the middle of the night and secondly it was the middle of a blizzard. Tch, Kurogane sneered as he started walking down the abandoned streets. He could feel the cold penetrating the otherwise so thick jacket, even though it was freezing, nothing could freeze the fury inside him. He had been living with Tomoyo for three years, and about a year ago when Kurogane got his new job, a salesclerk in a shop run by an older lady called Yuuko, the trouble started. She forced Kurogane to work overtime, weekends and holidays. He was never around the apartment anymore. So technically it was partly his fault that Tomoyo secretly started seeing somebody else, which infuriated him even more. The first bar, about two miles from his home, he came across he entered. The reason he went inside the small pub was either to escape from the storm or to get the liquor he so desperately wanted right now. He took a seat close to the bar and ordered some scotch. And started over thinking the whole situation. Sometimes he wished he was somewhere else. To just escape this pile of misery and take a bus somewhere, a destination unknown. The idea crossed his mind again and again, and when he finished his the second bottle of scotch, he genuinely thought it to be for the best. The bartender however was less then content with Kurogane drinking liquor as if it were water, and after a few hours he forced Kurogane to go home. As Kurogane stumbled outside, he normally could hold a lot of liquor but for some reason tonight seemed like an exception, he made way to the bus stop to execute his plan. It was about ten a clock at the time, so there were still busses that could get him anywhere he wanted. Satisfied he sat on a bench near the bus stop only to have the alcohol overpower him, not long after that he fell in a deep slumber…

When he awoke it was a lot later, according to his wristwatch it was after midnight. He grunted deeply when he didn't feel as drunk and clearly felt the cold but more importantly the worst part was that he actually had missed a chance to step aboard some random bus. He sweared to himself as he tried to get up from the bench he had been lying on for the past few hours.  
'Stupid life, stupid cold.' He grunted. 'Well better not rest here any longer, and I think I've made Tomoyo wait long enough.' He thought to himself. He stood up and was ready to cross the street as he saw a bus driving towards him. It didn't look like any of the busses he used to ride to work, no there was something of with this one. For starters it didn't show where it was going and secondly it was past midnight why the hell would a bus ride around at this hour? Confused as Kurogane was at that moment, he just watched as the vehicle got closer and stopped right in front of him. The door opened and from behind the wheel a friendly voice called out to him.  
'Yo, mister. Your bus has arrived. C'mon don't wait out in the cold, come inside.' A person stood up from the driver's seat. A young man, if Kurogane had to estimate about 25 years old, stood in the doorway. He was wearing a normal uniform, white long sleeved shirt with a blue jacket on top. On the jacket he could see multiple logo's from places around the world, he recognized few like hard rock café Rome and highway 66, others he didn't know. 'Come on, you must be freezing out there, let me take you home.' The driver said again, while looking at him even though his long hair clearly limited the view he had. As Kurogane regained his composure he replied 'Where are you going, euhm I don't have to be that far, but I'm pretty sure the busses don't stop near my house.' 'Well I happened to pass by and saw you standing there, and I thought to myself that maybe you wanted a drive home. So hop aboard and tell me where you live.' Kurogane snorted 'You happened to pass by?' 'Yep, seems a bit conspicuous doesn't it?' Kurogane laughed out loud and the driver continued 'But there is no coincidence in this world, all is predestined. Now haul your ass in here or I'm going to leave without you.' Kurogane decided to go along with it, since he was practically frozen to the bone and didn' feel like waking the two mile trip home. 'Ok you can take a seat behind me. My name is Hitsuzen and I'll be your driver today. So make yourself comfortable.'

As Kurogane sat down on the bench behind Hitsuzen he immediately felt the urge to sleep. The bench was very comfortable, so comfortable he wanted to lie down on it and just close his eyes and drift away. As he had to fight the urge to sleep he said to the driver.  
'You haven't asked me where I live, or did you?' Kurogane yawned loudly. 'I don't need to know where you live, Kurogane. You aren't going home yet, as I said all is predestined and you are destined to help a lot of people. That is why destiny called out to me to help you.' Kurogane really had to fight against the sleep by now, and with his last shred of consciousnesses he practically whispered 'I don't remember telling you my name. how did you know…' Hitsuzen smiled when he looked at the big sleeping man. 'Man you are going to want to kill me when you are going to wake up tomorrow don't you?' He sighed deeply.  
'Let's go to our first destination, the magnificent city of Celes, where your true soulmate is waiting for you.' Hitsuzen said while turning on the radio. As the dark buildings and parks ran by he sang along with the singer. 'I am the space and I'm flying high, I am the astronaut in the sky. Don't worry I'm okay now…'

Tomoyo had literally cried herself to sleep, a undeep slumber, she reacted to every sound she heard in the building. After all she was hoping to hear her grumpy Kurogane stumble inside the hall or climbing the stairs. Her dream was more of a nightmare, until a boy suddenly pops up. From what Tomoyo could tell he was young with long dark hair, a friendly and warm face and yet his blue eyes, though hidden under the long dark hair, seemed perceptive and showed he had a sharp mind. He was wearing a jacket with a lot of sewn on prints and blue jeans that are clearly worn of.  
'Hi Tomoyo, it's been a while hasn't it.' He says as the dark, nightmarish scenery slowly changes to a peaceful forest with a pond and the setting sun. The man takes a seat next to the pond, where a stone bench appears out of thin air.  
'I'm sorry but have we met before, I can't remember you yet you feel… familiar.' 'I should feel familiar, you are the one that called out to me after all, well Kurogane too but I came because you asked me to.' 'I called out to you?' 'You did but well, you aren't really aware of your powers in this world are you?' 'Powers? This is very confusing. What did you do to Kurogane?' Tomoyo says while sitting down on the bench. 'Kurogane is going to search for his destined person, as you might have sensed he doesn't really belong with you. Unconsciously you wanted him to be truly happy, so you called out to me. The name is Hitsuzen, glad to help your man.' After a few minutes of with an expression of shock Tomoyo shakes her head. 'It's a bit unbelievable but yes, I want Kurogane to be happy, I understand the whole searching for his soul mate too. Can you tell Kurogane just one more thing?' 'Of course I can, well if he doesn't kill me when he wakes up, he's still under the impression he is going back home after all, I might have put him to sleep on my bus because since I knew he wouldn't come with me otherwise. You warned me he was stubborn…' Tomoyo laughed 'He is, isn't he? Well tell him I'm very sorry for what I did, and that I will be waiting for him.'  
'Al right will do.' Tomoyo thought a moment and continued 'Oh also, tell him to change underwear regularly, the man is more like a pig than the ninja he pretends to be.' Hitsuzen laughed. 'If that is all I'll be going back, this is costing me a lot of energy. I'm driving the bus as we speak you see.' And with that Tomoyo wakes up. She slowly walks to the window in the dining room where she can see the city. Somewhere in the dark Kurogane was starting a journey. 'Even though our hearts are apart, we are still together.' She whisper against the silent room, slowly reaching out to the city only to touch the cold glass. 'Be careful…' In the bus Hitsuzen starts laughing 'Man you have good friends Kurogane, she loves you so much she is prepared to let you go on this journey.' He says against the snoring man.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Fated meeting**

'Wakey, wakey Kurogane.' Hitsuzens whispers while he continues to poke Kurogane in the face with the broomstick, the same broomstick that Hitsuzen normally used to clean the bus when someone threw up. The broomstick was a matter of safety since Hitsuzens didn't really know how Kurogane would react to the kidnapping and taking him to faraway places. He was hoping a distance between them of a meter or so would protect him from the muscled armed man.  
'Dude, when is this guy ever gonna wake up.' Hitsuzens sighs walking towards the exit of the bus to put the broomstick away in the small cabinet he built for the cleaning equipment. 'If you don't wake up I'm gonna have to do ugly stuff to you.' He says against the sleeping man, with no respons whatsoever from the sleeping giant. Hitsuzen decides to take out the big guns and he starts speaking seductively 'Oh Tomoyo, you naughty girl, oh yeah right there baby.' Kuroganes eyes immediately flew open as he screamed 'GET THE HELL OF MY GIRLFRIEND!' Though when noticing Tomoyo wasn't around and this certainly not being in his house to start with, al the memories of the previous night came back to his mind. He pointed his finger to Hitsuzen who was standing in the doorway of the bus.  
'You, what did you do to me!' 'Don't be mad at me please, this is what you wanted isn't it. A bus that takes you away from home to a destination unknown.'  
'Yeah I wanted that when I was DRUNK. And seeing that I'm not really drunk right now it doesn't seem like a good idea at all.' Hitsuzens sighed 'You weren't meant to be with Tomoyo, that is all I'm allowed to speak say. But I informed Tomoyo you were going on this journey and she agreed to let you go, she also told me to get you underwear because you are a pig.' Kurogane laughed in disbelief. 'So she really let me go huh.' 'She loves you but now she realizes more than ever that you can't be happy with her.' Hitsuzen takes a seat back after the wheel.  
'Excuse me…' A beautiful voice chimed from outside the bus. Kurogane hurried up from his seat and couldn't believe his eyes. In front of the bus a man was standing, unlike any Kurogane had seen ever in his life. He had blue eyes, long blond hair and smile on his face. His skin was creamcoloured and he was long and fairly skinny, though not the unattractive kind. Kurogane was dumbfounded at the sight, only able to think how much this man looked like an angel.

'A meeting by chance, Hitsuzen welcomes you.' Hitsuzen says against the man. 'Ah, I'm sorry but my feet carried me here unknowingly.' 'Don't worry about it, happens all the time, my name is Hitsuzen, the big grumpy looking man staring at you over there is Kurogane.' 'I'm not grumpy and I was most certainly NOT staring.' Kurogane replied loudly.  
'Don't worry Kuro-chi, you don't look grumpy at all, my name is Fai.' The blonde man replied. 'The name is Kurogane. K-U-R-O-G-A-N-E!' Kurogane could feel a blush creeping up to his cheeks. Why was he blushing at such a stupid remark, he never blushed, real men don't blush. 'Whatever you say Kuro-wan.' Fai said teasing the big man and enjoying seeing his reaction. 'What I wanted to ask is where this bus is going.' 'Oh man the truth is I don't know either.' Hitsuzen says while he leans back in the driver's seat. 'You see, we go where the road takes us. Where fate takes us.' 'That's a shame then…' Fai replied 'I was hoping you could take me across the country away from Celes, I can't take the risk ending up close to here.' 'I see. It's a shame indeed then, sorry to get your hopes up.' 'Not at all, it was a pleasure to meet you two, have a great stay Hitsuzen-san Kuro-wan.' He says while turning around and walking away.  
'Hey wait.' Kurogane yells out to Fai while stepping outside.  
'Uhm, Kurogane?' Hitsuzen asks. 'Yeah.' He grunted while keeping his eyes on Fai trying hard not to lose him in the mass of people who were standing around the station. 'You have 48 hours before I leave here.' 'What? Why?' 'It's a rule, man. I can't stay longer in a city then 48 hours. If you must know the reason I have a bus is because I'm always on the move.' Damned Fai was getting harder to separate from other people. 'Okay, any other rule you want to say before I run after a man I don't even know?' Hitsuzen laughed 'No rules just some advice, in case you get lost close your eyes and let destiny guide you towards the place you should go.' 'Yeah, destiny can guide me… Will do.' Kurogane snorted in disbelief.  
'I know it seems crappy advice, but when the time will come you'll get it. Now go after him.' 'Thanks.' Kurogane says before he takes off like a lighting jolt.  
Hitsuzen sighs 'The man really has luck, most people don't get to see their soul mate, they actually have to look around for them. Heh, Kuro-chi.' Hitsuzen mutters while, getting up. 'Well I'll better change the bus before they come back then, we'll need a sleeping compartment.'

'Damned,' Kurogane sweared to himself. 'I lost Fai in the crowd… Note to self, kill Hitsuzen for keeping me busy with some random shit.' He thinks while continuing to run in random directions around the station. 'Why am I chasing after the guy anyway, it's not like I know him or anything.' It didn't stop him from calling out Fai's name several times before giving up. He decides to take a seat on the border of the fountain on the plaza in front of the station. 'Celes… Never been here before.' Kurogane mutters. Al he knew about the city was what he had heard from people that came in the store he works, or used to work. He sure as hell was fired if he didn't get back in a day or two. But I digress, from what he knew Celes was a place for romance. Very cold in the winter, yet under the city an ingenious underground pipeway system brought hot steam all over the streets and buildings, keeping it warm. So it was always possible to sail the small canals in the city and sit on the richly decorated plaza's scattered throughout Celes. Therefore lot's of couples enjoyed coming there. Even Kurogane had planned to take Tomoyo there after he got a vacation.  
'Well I'm not gonna find Fai by sitting here. Might as well roam around the city. Can't be that big.' However the ninja was severely mistaken. Celes was to Clow country, what Paris was to France. And so he spend an entire afternoon looking around, eventually getting lost in the maze of backstreets and shopping malls. To his dismay he couldn't even find his way back to the station.

Kurogane felt stupid for getting lost, even more if he thought about what Hitsuzen would say about that. Nearly 9 hours had passed since he left the bus and Kurogane hadn't showered or eaten since yesterday. Well if he had to choose between getting back to the station and finding Fai, who did seem to like teasing him. He would most certainly go after Fai though. He sighs deeply 'Well the situation can't get any worse so, might as well give Hitsuzens let-destiny-lead-the-way a shot.' So he closes his eyes. 'This is stupid, I'm standing in the middle of the road with my eyes closed, bumping into everybody…' But then a feeling comes to him, a sort of chill running down his spine, though not being an unpleasant feeling. It takes over his legs and suddenly left, going left feels good. 'Well I'll be damned…' Kurogane says.

How long had he been walking before his the feeling stopped? Ten maybe twenty minutes? Well, when the feeling disappeared and Kurogane opened his eyes, he saw people sitting behind tables. His feet had carried him to a bar. He had even entered it unknowingly, with his eyes closed, which apparently made the people point at him. 'What's the matter never seen anyone being led by destiny?' Kurogane lashed out at them, causing the people to shiver and spill their drinks. When he looked around further to the back he saw a piano standing on top of a stage. 'Must be some sort of jazz bar.' Kurogane thinks, while he takes a seat behind the counter.  
'Scotch please.' He asks the waiter, whom immediately pours out a glass and slides it across the bar. 'Hey, when is the show starting?' Kurogane asks him. 'You're just in time for or best act.' The waiter replies with a smile, we've got a really talented dancer behind stage preparing. When he's ready I'll get a signal to play the piano, but it should be any time now.'  
'Thanks for the info.' Kurogane says while giving the man a bill of 10 dollar. 'You can keep the change if you can tell me if you have seen a blonde, slender man. He looks kinda like an angel.' '  
Sounds like you're going to be in for a treat.' The waiter says while making his way to the stage. 'Hey my change!' 'Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we are proud to announce our best singer and dancer. According to some he is more of an angel than he is human. Give him a warm welcome. Fai D. Flowright!' A loud applause fills the bar while the lights go out and the piano starts a melancholic melody. 'Precious moments, fleeting memories.' A familiar voice comes from behind the curtain. 'I love you but my heart has forgotten.' All spotlights aiming at the center of the stage. As the blonde man steps from behind the curtain. 'Only the body remembers. So please touch me, love me.' While he starts a dance, every move accentuating his perfectly slender body. Kurogane only could stare mesmerized by the beauty of the man on stage as he continues his dance, perfectly aware that Kurogane was staring at his body.

Me: Chapter two, can't believe it xD thank you for the two reviews really appreciate it!  
Kurogane: you should really use your time to study instead of writing stories about me getting lost and blushing  
Fai: Oh come on, it's harmless writing in his free time, right?  
Me: Yes, must write in "free" time, just one more chapter then I'll quit, I promise!

Next chapter will be better I swear!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Bad romance**

Fai's show lasted for about an hour, an hour in which no person in the bar dared to move, scared to miss a part of the show he gave. Kurogane was no exception on this, staring to the mysterious man. Dreaming away in his song and dance. He wondered why he enticed him like he did. Feelings started stirring up in the ninja as Fai's dance got increasingly seductive. 'All right for my last song.' The crowd went awe.  
'I'm sorry to, but all good things come to an end right?' He smiled at the audience, Kurogane could swear his eyes gazed to him a second longer then to anyone else in the bar. 'Firstly I would like you to thank my pianist, who will stop playing now and do what he is best in, pouring drinks. Give him a warm applause, Yukito.' Applause filled the room as Yukito stood up from his place and bowed down, before leaving the stage. 'My last song is one you all might now, a singer that really influenced me, by heart and soul. You all know what song I will sing now.' As he gave a sign to Yukito, who pressed the play button of the karaoke machine. Kurogane immediately recognized the song as well, bad romance by lady gaga.  
As the music started Fai also began another dance, completely different from the rest of his repertoire. He gave it his all, and by that Kurogane means he even left the stage, rolled over the tables and started getting closer to him. 'Work, fashion baby. Work it, move that bitch crazy.' Fai sang as he walked over to the bar as if taunting Kurogane. 'As he pressed himself against Kurogane while continuing to sing. 'I want your love, and I want your revenge, I want your love. I don't wanna be friends.' While Fai used a free arm to pull up one of Kurogane's hands, using it to caress his entire chest as the song continued. 'I don't wanna be friends, want your bad romance.' His hand letting go of Kurogane's and moving up to the side of his head, like he was holding a invisible gun. 'Want your bad romance.' As the music started Fai acted like he pulled a trigger and stumbled away from Kurogane as if wounded like a butterfly with one wing. Kurogane could swear he saw a tear rolling down his face as he danced his way back to the stage. Falling on his back, while the last melody chimed through the air. Fai sat back up and whispered in the microphone 'Thank you, I had fun singing for you tonight.' Kurogane looked at the pretty face, not seeing a tearstain, even though he could have sworn he saw him crying…

'You sure got lucky.' Yukito says against Kurogane. 'It's the first time I've seen him dance like that.' 'Yeah?' Kurogane grunts, while taking another sip from his scotch. He did feel a lot of things, but luck wasn't one of those feelings. Aroused and flustered, but not lucky. 'You like him don't you?' Yukito continues, while shaking up some cocktails. Kurogane snorted 'I have no clue what you're talking about, I've only met the guy once.'  
'But that is all we need right? One meeting can change your fate.' 'You talk like someone I know, which isn't positive.'  
'Do I now? Tell you what, if you tell me how you know about fate walking. And I'll tell you about Fai. Seeing as you aren't interested in him at all.' Yukito smiled while leaning over towards Kurogane. 'Tch, fine then. I'm guessing fate walking is what I did to get here, right? Well a man called Hitsuzen told me about it.'  
'Hitsuzen you say? Then you got here by bus right?' Kurogane's eyebrows twitched. 'So you made a journey as well, have you.' He replied. 'I might have, but it doesn't really matter. Since you told me the truth I'll talk to you about Fai.' Yukito continues 'Just be careful with telling people about Hitsuzen, he might be a good person. But he has some enemies in Celes. Anyhow what do you want to know about Fai?'  
Kurogane thinks a while as the memories about the conversation that morning pop in his mind. 'Would he have any reason to want to leave here?' Yukito's face hardens instantly. 'How did you… Urgh… Destiny indeed… Fine I promised I would tell you.' He sighs  
'There might be a man Fai would want to get away from. But he can't.' 'Why's that?'  
'Simple, he doesn't have the courage to take risks. He is waiting for someone to help him get away.' 'Someone like me, that's what you're thinking right?'  
'Hyuu, I really got them going tonight, didn't I Yukito?' A familiar voice sounds from behind Kurogane. As he turns around, he sees the angelic face that had just gotten so close to him. 'Why hello Kuro-myu. Did you like my show? Did you like the extra?' He ask suggestively, as Kurogane feels a blush creeping upwards to his cheeks he replies 'It wasn't bad.' 'Don't worry Kuro-wan I do it every show, I just saw you sitting there before I got on stage and thought I could tease you.'  
'So Fai-san, what will you drink now?' Yukito asks the blond man. 'I'll have the usual, put it Kuro-wan's tab if you will.' 'That's KUROGANE! And why the hell am I paying for your drinks as well.' The ninja lashes out. Fai smiles gently 'You know what Yukito, I'm in a good mood today, I'll pay for my and his drink. You heard me Kuro-chi the drinks on me. But you have to talk to me as a compensation. All night long.'

And so both man started talking. About everything and nothing, about relationships that had gone wrong. About the weather, multiple times which always ended in a consensus that it was quite warm for the time of year. The only thing Fai didn't mention was his own personal life, but after a few drinks not even Kurogane paid any attention to that anymore. For the first time in weeks he felt good, no not just good. He felt like a king, and he even felt that Fai could be his queen, if Fai could be that for him, life would be better than ever before. 'So Kuro-chi where are you gonna stay tonight?' Fai, who had red cheeks from the alcohol, asked the big man sitting next to him. 'Well I don't think the bus is an option, I wouldn't want to sleep on a bench again. But even worse I haven't showered or changed clothes since yesterday.'  
'Oh dear that isn't how big doggy can live is it? Well I'll tell you what, you can stay with me then. I'm glad to have some company anyway. Hyuu.' 'Can I really?' Kurogane asks unbelievingly, a man who didn't really know him wanted him to stay over at his place.  
'I think you are a good person. So why not? Come on let's get you and your drunk ass over to my place.' Kurogane's eyebrows twitched. 'If any of us two is drunk it'll be you.'  
'Yukito, I'll be going now, with big doggy here. He's been a bad and dirty doggy so he's going to shower at my place tonight.' 'HEY, he doesn't have to know those things.' Kurogane answered with a deep voice, making it almost sound like a bark. 'Tomorrow I'll be back around six.' Fai says happily before he steps away from the bar doing a pirouette and almost bumping into four people in the process. 'No you won't be coming back tomorrow. But that's okay, Hitsuzen finally came to intervene with you. Good luck on your journey Fai.' Yukito silently whispers.

Fai's apartment was big, too big for one person, that was Kurogane's impression anyway. The entrance showed a hallway with three doors. One leading to a bathroom with a shower and a big bubble bath. The other door lead to a big living room, with a big flat screen television designer bench and a oak wood dining table that seemed more appropriate in a mansion. Behind the table he saw a small kitchen installed. The third door was the entrance to the bedroom, Kurogane hadn't seen the inside of that but he could guess how the place looked seeing the rest of the flat was luxurious as hell.  
'You can take a bath in there, Kuro-chi. I'll give you some of my clothes, a towel you can find in the closet. Get in there and wash yourself because you smell big doggy.' 'Tch, fine.' Kurogane says while going in the bathroom.  
The hot water really refreshed Kurogane's tensed muscles up well. He enjoyed the bubbles as well. That is until a certain blond man opened the door and enters the bathroom. 'Hey, HEY, I'm in your tub.' Kurogane screams while using his hands to cover up his most intimate parts. 'Oh sorry Kuro-chi, I just wanted to put these clothes in here and take your old ones, so I can have them cleaned.' Fai says while he keeps standing next to the tub. 'No need to be ashamed though, it looks like Kuro-chi is a big doggy after all.' He says while smiling and giggling, making Kurogane fluster. 'Just leave already.' He mutters, deeply ashamed, while Fai dances his way back to the doorway, closing the door softly. Outside he falls to the ground. 'What am I doing… Seeing him makes me wanna tease him, I wanted to see his body.' He grips his hands against his chest. 'No I can't fall for him. Everything always goes wrong when I fall for someone.'

The clothes Fai had given Kurogane were a little too tight for him. Not that he cared for any of that. It wasn't like Fai hadn't seen him naked anyway. He thought while going in the living room. Fai wasn't there, but he had left a note on the table.  
'_You should sleep in my bed, the sofa is really uncomfortable to sleep on. I took the liberty of going to sleep already. Be silent when getting into bed._'

He sighs 'Well he wouldn't lie against me would he? Might as well sleep with him.' He thinks while entering the bedroom. The sight of the sleeping Fai stirred up the feelings he had buried ever since Fai had entered the bathroom. He silently got in the two person bed. He lay beside Fai for a while. 'Sorry Fai, I'm sorry but I can't sleep like this.' Kurogane whispers while sitting up on the side. 'I think I might like you. No I'm certain about that, I like you.' He says while turning his head to the sleeping man. He stand up and leaves the room again. 'Why do you care for me, Kurogane? Why can't you just not like me.' The blond man says while tears flowed down his face.

Kurogane awoke late in the afternoon, the couch had been perfectly comfortable, though he had expected that much. Fai wasn't around the living room at the time, so Kurogane took the liberty of making himself something little to eat from the fridge. However when Fai didn't show up he did get worried. It was three in the afternoon, where could he be? He decided to go back to the bedroom and there he saw Fai, still lying in the bed. Something didn't feel right however. Fai hadn't moved a bit since yesterday night. 'Fai, are you okay?' Kurogane says while sitting down on the side Fai was sleeping. 'Fai?' he repeats, getting no reaction from the man in bed. 'Fai wake up.' He says while tapping his shoulder harder and harder. 'Come on Fai snap out of it!' Kurogane practically screams while putting his arms around the frail man's chest. 'Why aren't you waking up, why are you so cold? Damned Fai please be allright!'

Me: chapter 3 all finished and done. It's a long one too. I don't own bad romance! I just wanted to make Fai dans smexily all over the place XD diabolic!  
Kurogane: way to seductively if you ask me...  
Fai: yeah Kuro-wan got a nosebleed, thank god no one noticed.

As I promised it would be better :p love and a cliff hanger, what is wrong with Fai?


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Bonds which are**

'Destiny, a faithful meeting. Bending, changing, actively shaping the future. One meeting changes everything. If I hadn't picked up Kurogane, he wouldn't have met Fai, not in this lifetime at least.' Hitsuzen says against the silent bus. 'But the cataclyst, the changing point, in this story wasn't me. It always has been, the person who only exists within one realm.' He sighs 'Your methods don't change, my butterfly. Still bluntly changing lives, for the sake of the two futures. I can't help but wonder, who paid the price, or did they both pay for it, unconsciously wanting to meet each other…'  
Darkness came and the bus disappeared. 'Ah a dream visit? I wondered when you would show up, Yuuko…' He says against the long slender woman, dressed in dark robes. 'You aren't even surprised. It isn't fun that way, Hitsuzen. At least jump up, or scream the next time.' Hitsuzen laughed 'I will, now let's talk. You surely didn't come just to see me, did you?'  
'Afraid not Hitsuzen. I'm here because I've had payment from two people, so I'm coming to deliver you two objects you will need in a not so distant future.' 'Ah still so blunt butterfly, so the stage for the grand story has been set then?' Hitsuzen asks with a childlike smile. 'Indeed, so would you please be so kind to take these two objects to our protagonist?' 'I'll be glad to, Yuuko-san.'

Kurogane didn't know what to do. Fai didn't have a phone in his apartment so calling an ambulance wasn't an option. Not even the neighbors responded when Kurogane knocked on their doors, almost to the point of breaking the wood. He didn't know what to do, the only place he could take Fai was to Hitsuzen, which actually seemed logical, maybe he knew his way around town. Knew the way to the hospital. But he didn't know the way to the station from the apartment... He thought while he took the blonde man's cold body in his arms and carried him out the building. 'Don't you dare to die on me Fai.' He grunted, as he let fate take over his body and walked in the one destined direction.

When his feet stopped and he opened his eyes, he immediately recognized the station. Kurogane was surprised though, yesterday the place was swarmed with people yet today he didn't see anybody. In fact the entire plaza was quiet, he couldn't hear any sound. Not that he complained though, it made finding Hitsuzen's bus a lot easier.  
'Kurogane, I told you, only I can kidnap people. Take that back to where you found it. Bad Kuro-chi.' Hitsuzen joked while he stood in the entrance of the bus, seeing the big man approach him with Fai in his arms. 'Not in the mood, something is wrong with Fai.' Hitsuzen's expression changed immediately. 'Bring him in. I changed the seats to a bed, you can lay him down there.' Kurogane nodded in agreement while he entered the bus. Indeed the interior had changed, the last three rows of benches had disappeared and made room for a giant two person bed. The bed itself was covered with cushions and sheets making it look like a giant bed from a love hotel, rather than a bed compartment in a bus. 'Dear lord, you were going to make us sleep in that?' Kurogane asked Hitsuzen, while gently placing Fai's body on the giant love-bed, wondering why it made him look like a princess sleeping waiting to be kissed by his prince. He could easily imagine bending over the frail man and kissing him, waking Fai and breaking the spell holding him in the slumber. 'Now take us to the hospital.' Kurogane grunts, almost cursing himself for dreaming of in this situation.  
'No can do Kuro-chi.' 'What?' He answered angrily, while making way towards the driver seat and grabbing Hitsuzens collar. 'Listen here buddy, Fai is sick, from the looks of it he's dying. We are NOT gonna argue a moment longer. Take me to a hospital NOW!' 'We aren't gonna take him to a hospital...' Hitsuzen replied while pulling the hands back of his jacket. 'because they can't help him. But if you give me a moment to take a look at him. I might figure out what is wrong with him.' 'What you got a doctors degree in the day I was gone?' Kurogane asked sarcastically. 'Actually it's my university degree, the diploma hangs out in the back of the bus. You just didn't see it until now.' As he pointed to the wall to the small frame hanging there. 'Well I'll be damned...'

'Certainly not a wound, can't see any signs of infections bacterial or viral as well.' Hitsuzen continued. 'His body is allright, but why is his body temperature dropping and he can't wake up…' He mutters, more to himself then Kurogane, while continuing to look at Fai's body. In the short time he had met Hitsuzen he had never seen him so serious. In fact this might have been the first time the man wasn't smiling like an idiot, reminding him of the other idiot he was saving. 'Idiot saving idiot, destiny must really be cruel.' He thought to himself. 'Hey Kurogane, what did you do last night. Tell me everything, and with that I mean all the details.' 'If you think that will help.' Kurogane replies while sighing heavily. Starting to tell how they had met, drank together and Fai invited him over. Not interrupting Kurogane once, Hitsuzen just listened. 'Kurogane, you like Fai don't you.'  
'What has that to do with anything.' Kurogane says while a blush creeps up to his face. 'Come on, you probably told him so right?' Kurogane swallowed loudly. 'I might have said…' 'You bound Fai with your words, probably unknowingly though.' Hitsuzen says while putting a hand against Fai's forehead. 'Do you know Briquet's syndrome Kurogane.' 'Haven't heard from it, what does it mean for Fai?'  
'He probably wasn't sleeping. He heard your words, whatever you said awoke a lingering psychological trauma, his pain being directed to a physical problem. It's called a somatoform disorder, like sleeping and not waking up.' 'So it's not dangerous then?'  
'Au contraire, Fai is stuck in his mind, being tormented by ghosts of the past. Ghost you awoke. Kurogane I don't want to scare you but seeing as how his condition is, it looks like he is in a coma. A sort of waiting stage untill his body temperature gets to low and his heart just is going to stop...' Hitsuzen says calmly. 'What can we do?' Kurogane asks feeling anger rising, because Hitsuzen clearly didn't care what happened to the blonde man. 'Indeed Kurogane, tell me how far would you go to safe him?'

'What does that have to do with anything?' Kurogane asks trying to subdue the rage. 'You brought Fai into the state he is right now. Unwillingly or not, you changed his destiny. Entangling it with yours. So tell me Kurogane, would you risk your soul to safe his before it is too late?' Kurogane didn't even have to think about that one as he automatically reacted with 'What do I do?' Hitsuzen smiled, while taking out a scroll. 'You have to enter his mind and defeat whatever is chasing him.' 'You can do that?' 'Yeah with this scroll I can, but Kurogane whatever happens to you in his mind. Well, it will be equally inflict in pain to your physical body. Dying in his mind is dying in the real world as well. and since he isn't in control of his mind, anything literally anything could happen. Knowing this will you still risk it?' Kurogane stood up looking Hitsuzen in the eyes as he nodded. 'I will free him.'  
'That's what I wanted to hear. Fine, I'll send you in his mind. Come let's not waste more time. You have to touch Fai's body for this to work.' Hitsuzen says while leading Kurogane back to Fai giving him a hand to hold. He opens the scroll and starts reading the incantation written on it. His words chiming trough the air, transforming into floating sigils. Surrounding Kurogane and Fai. Pulsating in soft light as Hitsuzen whispers. 'Kiss him Kurogane. Carry over your desire to safe him in a pure act of love. Bind your soul to his and enter his mind. 'What?' Kurogane yells. 'You didn't say that before!' 'Yeah and I almost forgot to give you this as well.' Hitsuzen says while throwing a sheathed katana. 'Thanks I guess…' 'Now hurry, the sigils aren't going to last all day you know.'

'He's weird, he's an idiot and he pisses me of. But man, I think I love you Fai.' Kurogane says while planting his lips on the cold mouth of the other man. The sigils lighting up intensly, as Kurogane feels a bit of warmth returning to those lips he's touching. Encouraged he pours all emotions he has into the kiss. As the sigils blind him, and the bus disappears into the bright light created by pure emotions, wanting nothing more to save Fai from whatever was harming him.

Hitsuzen sighs again. 'Prices have been paid, journeys have begun. Only you can save him Kurogane. Only you have the power to change his destiny. From the moment you two met, you both felt it. And even though your body doesn't know. Your hearts already have connected.' He huffs as he heaves Kuroganes body on the bad, placing him next to Fai's. 'The true test is just beginning. Bonds, which are, will they bring your victory Kuro-chi?'

**AFTER WRITING SEGMENT**

Hitsuzen: aww I didn't even got to give Kurogane the underwear I bought for him, this is getting way to serious writer, you said it would be humour...  
Me: I did, but yeah somehow I just want a good story, I think it's shaping up pretty good until now  
Kurogane: but what was up with that kiss...

Writer uses fanboy smile, it creeps everyone out...


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: memories of a murder**

Whoot chapter 5, can't believe the story is dragging on so long XD anyways, since this is the first chapter really taking my imagination to the limit I'm gonna do my best to make you see the dark side of Fai's mind as well.  
Oh and if you have time on your hands, there's a really talented writer I'd like to promote he does incredible stuff with Fai and Kuro-puppy:  
.net/u/2335377/emeraldgeminideathboar

'Kurogane, wake up. Oh come on don't make me toss of my couch.' A familiar voice chimes through the air, as Kurogane feels the hands poking him all over his body. 'Come on bad boy, I warned you the bench wasn't for sleeping. The only times you get to sit or lay on there is while making love to me.' He continued, climbing on top of Kurogane as gently starts massaging his upper back.  
Kurogane finally grasping what was happening jumped up, the blond man falling of him in the process. 'What the hell is going on, where is the bus? Why are you walking around, you were dying for god sake!' He yelled against Fai while stepping back until he felt the wall of Fai's apartment. 'Sounds like someone had a boo-boo dream.' Fai smiles at the man. 'So you want to eat breakfast or would you rather have a small appetizer?' He continues, taking of his shirt while walking over to the ninja, nuzzling himself against his big chest. 'As you can see I'm fine, Kuro-chi. I'm absolutely happy.' As the blond man slid his hands under Kuroganes shirt, making a blush creep up to his cheeks. 'I told you my name is Kurogane.' The other man replied, while bending over and savoring the hug. Tightly gripping Fai, never wanting to let him go. 'I thought I was gonna lose you.' He closed his eyes wishing the moment would never end. 'Euhm, Kuro-chi I can't breathe.' Fai coughed. 'And as you can see, I'm not going anywhere. You shouldn't go anywhere too Kuro-wan.' A feeling creeps over Kurogane, letting the blonde man go from his arms, almost pushing him away as Fai continued. 'You should stay here, forever and ever.' His voice changing, or not sounding like normal Fai. Someone different, and yet the same.

'You're, you're not Fai.' Kurogane realized, his expression pained at the epiphany. 'This isn't real, is it? You're just showing me what I want to see.' He angrily continued. 'Where is Fai! Who the hell are you!' He yelled, the words he screamed, echoing through the room with louder and louder until they had such power the windows of the apartment to exploded in a rain of glass shards. Gusts of wind entering trough the windows. Swirling around in the room with the power of a small tornado, tearing cracks in the walls, pulling out bricks, that disappeared in the darkness outside, and ripping of doors of cabinets, grabbing whatever they were hiding. Soon a tornado of knives, glass shards and kitchen utensils were flying around them. The winds throwing the objects away in random directions, picking them up again starting the cycle again. The couch on which they both had been laying was smashed by the oakwood table. The television screen got shattered by a chair as Kurogane could only stare at the transformation Fai was undergoing. With his head tilted backwards he lifted up his arms as if welcoming the storm, embracing its power. He slowly started floating, his feet hovering about five centimeter from the ground until he yelled. 'ENOUGH' Instantly stopping everything. 'I hate you Kurogane. I… Want to see you die slowly and painfully. What makes you so great that Fai already started forgetting about me? If I can't have my brother no one can Kurogane.' The man slowly whispers as his head tilted forward.  
'My name is Yuui… and Fai… my twin brother… murdered me.'

'Fai is obnoxious, an idiot and most certainly a good person. I don't buy whatever lie you are feeding me here.' Kurogane answered. 'Is that so? Well then mister, maybe seeing is believing. I'll show you the memory of my death exactly the way Fai remembers it.'

'_How's dinner Fai?' Yuui asks, Ashura really did his best tonight. He points at the long haired black man. 'It's al right…'Fai mutters more to himself then towards his brother. 'Don't worry Fai it's not the best I can do.' Ashura says with a smile at the blond boys, making Fai look angrily as he replies. 'You never can do your best enough! You're not my father or my mother!' Before he runs out the room.  
'I'm sorry Ashura.' Yuui says against the man while going over to him and hugging him. 'He'll adapt but it'll take time. I'll go talk to him.' 'Thanks Yuui.' Ashura mutters. _

'_Why are you on the roof again Fai?' Yuui asks the blond boy sitting on the edge, looking out towards the dark city. 'You know, I thought a lot about how things are right now.' Fai replied, not looking as his brother sits down next to him. 'If only one of us was born, our parents wouldn't have been in debts, right?' Yuui sighed, as he looked down on the abandoned street. 'You don't know that Fai. Everybody is glad we are born.' 'I'm not, I there was only one of us, our parents wouldn't have disappeared, they ran away and left us.' He says as tears stream out of his eyes. 'WHY DID YOU LEAVE US?' he screams out. As he stands up and takes a step back from the edge. 'WHY?' He screams again from the top of his lungs. 'You know Yuui, maybe if there would only be one of us they would come back.' He calmly speaks, surprising Yuui. 'I think it is time to say goodbye.' He smiles gently, while he shoves Yuui forward. 'I'll miss you, brother.'_

Kurogane grunted as the scenery changed once more, not back in the illusion they just were in, but in the real depts. of Fai's mind. The only two things he could see were the floating bricks above an endless darkness and on the other side, after Yuui, a stairwell leading down, deeper towards where Fai should be.  
'Nice trick you pulled there. Fai isn't a murderer however.' Kurogane continued, looking at the identical twin of Fai with anger. He normally could freeze people with a glare, but in Kuro-terms this was a deathglare.  
'Weird Kurogane.' Yuui replied, while slowly walking towards Kurogane. 'Faced with the truth, even knowing Fai was arrested on grounds of my murder and interrogated for ten hours straight. You still deny it.'  
'Yeah, I don't buy it.' He answers while firmly gripping the sheathed sword he had gotten from Hitsuzen. 'Now move aside so I can go down to find the real Fai.'  
'Sorry Kuro-chi, no can do. Fai killed me, even though the official rapport stated suicide. You know what happens to people who kill themselves Kuro-chi? They take away their most precious possession themselves. Life… They don't deserve heaven, the only thing waiting for me was hell. And now, thanks to you Fai is moving forward, forgetting he put me in this never ending torment in the first place.' Yuui whispers to Kurogane, closing the gap to about three meters. He stretches out his hand towards Kurogane. 'I will drag him back down with me Kurogane.' As the nails of his fingers grow rapidly ending in a sharp point. He closes his eyes, while continuing 'If you want to pass here you will die trying.' Slowly opening them again, his pupil narrowing like a cats. 'Now die…' He whispers in Kurogane's ear, as he instantly closed the gap, his finger piercing through Kurogane's heart. The finger shortens, covered in the ninja's blood as Yuui licks it clean, turns around and walks away. Kurogane slowly falling over on the cold stones.

'This can't be how it ends.' His last shred of conscience yells against his body. 'Protecting Fai… saving him, you love him. Can't die here… Must stand up. MUST SAVE FAI!' He yelled out, as the sheathed sword started to glow. Yuui noticed this. 'Resurrection, the power to call upon every cell in your body. Begging it to go on, summoning it to continue working for you. What a strong will to live you have. Thank god for that, otherwise this would be boring…' He says against the man, now standing back upon his both feet.  
'You are his brother Yuui, yet you still want him to live in agony for something you say he did to you. I won't have it, I will break the chains you put on Fai.' He snares proudly while unsheathing the katana, that shone brightly, as if made entirely out of light.  
'Let's see who is the strongest now!' He yells while running towards the blonde man. 'I couldn't agree more with you.' Yuui responds, his fingers lengthening. As he runs toward the ninja with his arm stretched forward, trying to pierce Kurogane's body once more. Anticipating the movements he slashes his sword against the long fingers, throwing them up in the air unbalancing Yuui for a split-second. Kurogane uses the time to change his the position of his hand on the katana, pushing the hilt into Yuui's chest with all his might, pushing the blonde man back, throwing him up in the air. Amazed by his own power, Kurogane watches the other man as he graciously lands back, creating a small gap in between them. 'Not bad at all Kuro-chi. Let's see if you can keep up if I go all out now.' He says as instantly he positions him close to Kurogane, who instinctively puts the sword between the fingers, unabling Yuui to pierce him once more. 'Impressive.' He mutters as he slashes with his free hand at the ninja, causing Kurogane to leap backwards releasing Yuui's other hand. He immediately follows Kurogane as he continues to swing his hands at him, Kurogane only being able to defensively recoil the blows. Pushing him back, slowly yet surely coming closer to the edge of the floating platform they are standing on. Kurogane curses loudly, only getting angrier at himself not being able to find an opening in the other man's attacks. 'I can't lose, I won't...' He mutters. 'You hear me Fai? I don't care if this is your brother, if he stands in my way I will defeat him.' His face angrily looking at the man, still pushing him towards the edge. Only about a half meter rests between the Kurogane and the dark abyss below. Kurogane tightly grips his katana, slashing at Yuui, who easily dodges the blows. 'Come on katana, help me...' He thinks while his feet slowly get pushed over the last tiles. Yuui smiles while lashing out at him one more time, Kurogane pivotes around the blond man pushing the sword against his back, as he trips and falls over in the darkness below. Kurogane sighs loudly. 'That was way to close...'

'Indeed...' A response comes from below, Kurogane twitching at the sound of the voice. As Yuui slowly rises up from the darkness. 'You didn't really think you could kill me by throwing me down in the darkness from which I came, didn't you?' He asks. 'It did seem a bit to easy indeed...' Kurogane replied scratching the back of his head. 'This is to tiring and I don't have the time. What do you say we end it now.' 'I couldn't agree more.' Yuui replied as they ran towards one another again. Their feelings clashing once more, ending in a total silence. As the two men stood with their back towards one another. Neither Kurogane nor Yuui moving. Until Yuui broke the quietness.  
'You realized this was a test for you, didn't you. But that night on the roof, I really did fall to my death.' 'Yeah, the way you acted in that memory clearly showed me you were a good person. Who cared a lot for his brother. As for the memory I think it was possible you died that night but not because Fai killed you, right?'  
'Yes, Fai wanted to kill himself, not me. He would have too, but I stopped him. We struggled a while and I slipped and fell over the edge...' 'So the memory showed me?' Kurogane grunted. 'Really is what Fai thinks happened that night, you see the police took him in. And for ten hours straight, from the accident until the afternoon after that he was questioned.' 'And after the questioning he was convinced he had killed you, wasn't he?' Kurogane answered.  
'Yeah, memory is a bendable thing isn't it?' Yuui smiled while a tear rolled down his face. 'You really love my brother don't you? Breaking through my illusion, defeating me. You will surely succeed in changing Fai's memory of that night. Who knows maybe you'll even defeat the next dark memory Fai has. You see, I'm not the only person who caused Fai a lot of hurt Kurogane. There are still two floors you'll have to cross before you will get to Fai.' 'I will get to your brother Yuui.' Kurogane grunted.  
'You know… Kuro…' Yuui coughed trying to keep the blond he felt in his mouth from running out over the floor. 'I'm… glad… to meet…' He struggled to say as he felt over, Slowly dissipating in the darkness. 'Yeah, me too…' Kurogane answered, wiping the tearstain of his cheek. As he slowly made way for the next level.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6****: 'Level 2: Ashura's pain'**

Me: I'm sorry Fai, I made you go through a lot but, Kurogane will succeed I think.

Fai: It's okay, at least I wasn't bound to Kuro-chi's blood yet, he was upper pissed whenever I had to feed at that time.

Kuro-chi: You would be to if someone was biting your hand, besides you always looked lustfully at me –or at least that's how I remember it XD-

Fai uses taunt, Kurogane used blush, Kurogane fainted…

The stairway down seemed never ending, leading him deeper and deeper. Kurogane had ran the first ten minutes down, however not seeing the end of it he had given up. Whatever was waiting for him must be buried deep inside Fai. As symbolic as it seems it just aggravated Kurogane. What had caused Fai so much pain?  
The deeper he went, the colder it got and the thicker the darkness seemed. Almost up to point where it became more fog-like then just a simple perception. It was becoming reality, with this Kurogane comes to the second platform. Which was identical to the first, only there was no staircase leading further down, there was however a door standing on the bricks, against gravity however. Wherever it led to didn't seem so important. What did was the humanlike shadow in front of it. Kurogane wasn't the least surprised to see the second person, he knew had interfered or crossed paths with Fai at some point. He sarcastically spoke. 'Hello Ashura.'

'Why hello to you to Kurogane. Why so surprised?' He said at the expression Kurogane made. 'This is Fai's mind after all. He made me in here, I am what he believes I am.' HE continued while slowly walking forward to the ninja. 'You know, at first I was surprised someone had beet Yuui. He was a grim shadow in Fai's mind. The sharp claws and eyes are a physical transformation of that darkness associated with the memory of his death.'

'Fai had nothing to do with that.' Kurogane grunted, as Ashura waved Kurogane's words away like swapping at a pesky mosquito. 'Yes, and by defeating Yuui Fai became aware of the contradiction between the memory and the way it was perceived by him. You saved him, clearing the contradiction, he didn't need a Yuui anymore. He dissipated in the darkness from which he was born.' The man steadily continued. 'I am different however, you felt it didn't you. On the way down, you felt the darkness getting thicker, you have reason to fear me Kurogane. I will always be a part of Fai for what I did to him.'

Kurogane angrily replied at the man. 'What did you do to him?' being it more yelling than talking normally, Clearly aggravated at the man's cold words. 'I'll tell you in due time. Firstly what knowledge did you gain out of Yuui's memory?' Kurogane had to do his best not to raise his sword at the man, blurting out that it didn't matter what Ashura did he just wanted to go down deeper into Fai's mind to save him. Being the gentleman he was he hissed at Ashura. 'Fai's parents left him, some ranting about a debt I dunno, you were living with the two, seemed fairly close to Yuui for that matter.' Ashura smiled, yet his eyes remained cold. 'Indeed Fai and Yuui were left alone when they were sixteen, their parents gambled a lot, raised a huge amount of debt. They left their suns alone and vanished from the face of the earth. Yuui, being the older one, matured so that he could give Fai the attention he needed.' He paused briefly, closing his eyes while thinking about his next words. 'We met by chance, Yuui and me… He was far ahead of his age you know, I at the time was 25, and I sincerely loved Yuui. And so we did meet for three years, it took us so much time to finally move in together. However, the memory Yuui showed you. The night he died… Was the second day Yuui had moved in with me, his brother being left alone.'

Kurogane sensed what the man was getting at and instinctively the hairs on his arms raised themselves, feeling the danger from the man, who clearly was fighting hard to suppress the emotions rising in him. 'He killed Yuui, not wanting to share him with anyone. I knew so. Come Kurogane, I will show you what awaits behind the door. My memory.' As he turned around, while sliding his hand along the wooden door practically whispering 'Welcome to limbo.' Looking at the magnificent designs of people grabbing on to each other. As the upper part of the wooden door represented people living in heaven, with two third being people who were grasping on to each other in vain. They would never reach high enough. For them only hell awaited. 'How do I get down to the next level if there is no staircase.' Kurogane asked looking at the man. 'The staircase is in the end of the room where this door leads to However I doubt your bond with Fai will reach that far. Come on in my Kurogane.' He says, while pushing the door open while waving at the man, compelling him to enter the darkness after it.

After the door there was nothing, only shadows, unabeling Kurogane to see anything. 'The hell, why can't I see anything.' Ashura in the doorway however responded. 'Yuui was lucky, only eyes and his hands. Tell me Kurogane, are you prepared?' As the door slowly closes, the last light disappearing. 'Are you ready?' Kurogane unsheathing his sword instinctively, holding it in front of him. The only light showing what was happening to Ashura. He wished he hadn't done it, Ashura still was standing in front of him. Their eyes still locked on to each other. As a tear welled up Ashura's eyes, a small stream of blood running down his cheek. 'Welcome…' He whispered emotionlessly against the other man, slowly beginning a maniacal laugh. 'IN DARKNESS!' He laughed, showing his teeth, slowly transforming in fangs as he licked across them with his tongue as the darkness slowly crept up his body, leaving no part of his body uncovered. Kurogane could only stare, as the darkness continued to mix with the man in front of him creeping under his skin, changing his entire body. The cool blue eyes Ashura had for instance, changed to gold colour, with the pupil of a cat, no the pupil of a predator. 'IN LONELINESS' The man yelled as his tshirt ripped, as two giant bat wings appeared on Ashura's back. Kurogane now heard cracking sound, if he had to guess it were the bones of Ashura's breaking and his body being rebuild by the darkness he had been living in for such a long time. Yuui had his original form, this man however was nothing more than a monster. 'I am a beast.' Ashura continued, regaining his normal composure. 'Look at me Kurogane. Look at my scale covered body, my claws, my fangs, my wings, my eyes. And now you have seen…' He laughed loudly 'Feast your eyes once more on my memory.'

As the scenery changed to room Kurogane was somewhat familiar with. 'This is the living room of the apartment you and Yuui lived in.' He grunted while trying his best not to look directly at the abomination standing in front of him. Rather he looked at the apartment seeing another familiar piece. 'This oak wood table, seemed out of place at Fai's apartment… Is it yours?' Ashura nodding in agreement. 'Hush, the memory will start now.'  
_As Ashura and Fai entered the room. Fai seeming exhausted, and Ashura emotionless as ever. 'I'm sorry Ashura.' Fai suddenly whispered while tears were falling down his cheeks, making him look so vulnerable Kurogane wanted to step up to the man and hug him tightly. 'Yes, I know.' Ashura replied sighing heavily, as he stepped close to Fai. 'But sorry isn't going to bring him back now, is it?' Fai almost stocking in the words, as Ashura slaps the man in the face. Fai shocked at the reaction. 'You always wanted to be your brother right? Admiring him, looking up to him… You dreamed you were in his place. Well tonight you can be.' He said while janking on Fai's arm, his back smacking on the oak wood table, as he pinned him down. Fai didn't that anything at this, Ashura continuing to beat against Fai's face, until his nose and lip were both bleeding. As he continued ripping open his t-shirt. Planting down his lips on Fai's vulnerable neck, sucking so hard Fai only screamed in pain, as Ashura felt the taste of blood in his mouth. His hands roughly working on the nipples_, as Kurogane had enough of this memory. Stepping forward, slashing out at the man clearly hurting Fai. The sword however went clean through the man as Ashura laughed. 'A memory cannot be changed, the only way for you to end this is to kill me. However if you can't you and I will be stuck in here forever, and ever.' He threw his head back as he let out a shriek of joy.

'_Please no.' Fai mumbled, as Ashura continued to slide his hands across Fai's body, leaving red streams on the milk colored skin. As Ashura himself still sucked on the man's neck, savoring the taste of the blood of the man that killed the person he loved most._ Kurogane lashed out towards the monster version of Ashura, who easily blocks the move with his bare arm. _'Please.' Fai muttered as he only felt pain, as Ashura opens up Fai's pants and roughly pulls them down_. Kurogane lashed out at the monster continuesly his sword doing practically no harm. Ashura laughed as he went in rebuttal, lunging himself at the man, grabbing his sword with his two hands as he sunk his fangs deep in Kuroganes neck. Kurogane could only loosen him up by hitting him with his fists. 'You are not using you sword correctly.' _As Fai moaned when Ashura pulled of his underpants, revealing the most sensitive spot in his body, which no man had ever seen before._ Infuriating Kurogane however as his swords started sparking, covering it in lightning jolts. Kurogane lashed out at the monster once more. When the sword made contact now, electric current ran through Ashura. At least paralyzing him. 'That is right Kurogane, more than the will to live, let your anger run through it as well.' Ashura laughed. However it was not enough to do serious damage to the monster.

_Fai started screaming at the sudden pain as Ashura trusted in all the way in one time. He screamed out in pain, tears falling down his face, as he desperately covered it. Not wanting Ashura to enjoy his pain even more than he already was._

Kurogane practically screamed at the monster. 'I won't lose to you monster. I will succeed.' The entire sword, including the hilt, starting changing. Becoming a sword he had only heard from in legends. A claymore, as the word on the hilt read Excalibur.

_The trusts were getting harder to endure as Ashura upped the rhythm, as he screamed 'I'm gonna cum Yuui.' __As he stopped the trusts to squirt his semen all over Fai's lower abdomen. Cathing his breath his whispered that nobody would believe him if he told anyone. _

As Ashura spread his wings, flying upwards, cracking the ceiling. Flying away in the darkness above him. The memory ended, and restarted once more as Fai and Ashura reentered the room. Kurogane trying his best not to pay any attention to that, as he tried to look for the man. Pointing his sword at every possible angle while turning position continuously because he didn't know when the man would strike at him. As the raping started once more, the window Kurogane had just passed shattered in fragments as the giant monster threw Kurogane of his feet, losing his sword in the process. Ashura pressed him against the wall, clawing, biting him as he couldn't escape from the strong hold he was in. 'Come on excalibur.' He yelled as the sword started shaking after him, a miracle happens. The sword with a mind of its own a sword that can manipulate reality itself. As excalibur pointed itself at the monster in front of it. Lunging itself at it, easily dodged by Ashura by stepping aside yet releasing Kurogane from his bind. The sword changed itself of position as Kurogane grabbed the hilt and pushed it in the heart of the monster. It shrieked out in pain and terror, as the memory started falling apart, the two persons on the table turning into stone, falling on the ground in dust.

Ashura changed back to his original form, the darkness leaving his body. 'I am a monster for what I did… I felt bad Kurogane, I had damaged the one living thing that could remind me of the person I loved.' Kurogane grunted, even though angry with the man he could understand him. 'I tried to buy my way out, giving him an apartment, getting him a job. It didn't matter, he hid the feelings deep down in his mind and heart, where I would never reach. I think you might be able to love Fai, but more importantly Fai mught be able to love you.' He couched up a lot of blood while continuing. 'That is a special sword you have there, let me guess, Hitsuzen?' As he slowly turned to stone as well. Kurogane shook him of the sword, as he shattered in a million pieces when he hit the floor. The only door out the apartment was the one Fai and Ashura had entered through. He opened the door as he looked out on the staircase to the last level separating him from Fai.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: looking-glass-self**

**Personal ranting:** allright chapter 7 already XD I just wondering if people actually are still interested seeing as Fai didn't get a big leading role in the previous chapters… I have another story in mind, started writing it too yet hit a block on how I should write it :p Enough rambling, enjoy the next chapter!  
If you know a little bit of psychology/ sociology you'll enjoy it for sure XD

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Kurogane had thought about the meaning about the idea of levels. The first, with Yuui, clearly was the conscious level. Fai directly thought he had killed his brother, he remembered this by himself. But since remembering was an active and dynamic process the police succeeded in convincing him that the death of Yuui was his fault. He had really believed so himself, luckily he was proven wrong and by defeating his brother Kurogane had released the real memory once more.  
Ashura however was bit more… subconscious. The memory seemed clear and detailed but Kurogane was sure that Fai wouldn't be able to remember a lot of the things he had seen when he woke up. Things as grim as rape are suppressed, hidden in the depths of our mind and when we least expect it, those feelings resurface, like a volcano erupting. However it was the price for this mechanism, enabling us to live with unbearable pain. In some cases we find someone to carry the pain with us, it was rare to find such a person. But when Kurogane defeated Ashura, he made it clear to Fai he was going to shoulder his pain. They would carry it together, and make life tolerable once more.

What could possibly await him on a lower level? He was in the subconscious of Fai, but after the darkness he had seen Kurogane couldn't imagine something even worse had happened to Fai. What he was sure about, was that anything could happen.

Kurogane was prepared for the worst, but to his surprise at the next level, no person awaited his arrival. In the middle of the floor there was nothing but a mirror, a standing mirror, wider and bigger then Kurogane. The frame, probably made out of wood, was richly detailed, carved out figurines smiling, dancing and talking. He recognized Yuui, Ashura, however he saw two more persons, probably his parents. On the top of the right, he saw himself.'What is this mirror supposed to be?' He asked out loud at his reflection, though surprised he was, to see that his reflection disappeared and made way for a figure he thought he wouldn't see again ever.  
Surprised as he was he could barely mutter the name of the small girl in front of him. 'Tomoyo..' As she smiled in reply to her name. She reached out and touched the glass separating them. 'Hello Kurogane, it seems you couldn't really keep yourself out of trouble. Tell me that you at least changed underwear regularly.' She said, clearly stressing the last part of her sentence.  
'How could I change underwear I'm in Fai's FREAKING mind.' He grunted in response. 'Besides that, why are you in Fai's mind? Have you met him?'  
'I haven't, I wish I could because I would like to meet him.' She says as her eyes suddenly turn cold for a moment. She continues, closing her eyes. 'What does this mirror represent Kurogane? Why does it stand in Fai's subconscious and more importantly why do you see me here?'  
'I dunno.' He grunts, Tomoyo looks at him while pouting. 'Yes you do…' She replies. 'After all, I know the answer, and I am a part of you.'  
'A part of me?' Kurogane as the answer slips in his mind. 'This mirror, on the subconscious level… Of course…' Tomoyo smiled at the crimson eyed man as she spoke slowly. 'The way we perceive ourselves…' Kurogane continued. 'Is determined by the way others perceive us. This mirror, is Fai's mirror of perceiving, it represents how his personality is made by asking him other people see him... And since I'm looking in it right now…'  
'You see what you desire or better said, the one thing you wish to see.' Tomoyo says, finishing Kurogane's sentence. 'Stop this madness Kurogane, this mirror shows what you want and you see for yourself. You don't want Fai, you want me.' As her face hardens, she continues. 'He is broken, used. Why would you even consider someone like that? What do you see in him?' Kurogane replies angrily 'He needs me. I like him, no I love him!'  
Tomoyo snorted. 'Love? Kurogane you met the man two days ago, how can you fall in love with someone so fast? Don't fool yourself into this, I'm still waiting for you at home.'  
'What the hell do you know about love? You fucking cheated on me!' Kurogane yelled against the girl in the mirror, she was unimpressed as she calmly replied. 'I'm a part of you remember? I am what you feel, projected through this mirror. You doubted this yourself before you came down here. These emotions, are YOURS! This doubt, it originates from you!'

'How do I defeat it?' Kurogane says while glaring at the reflection. 'How do I defeat these emotions?'  
'By defeating them the same way you defeated Fai's darkness. Project them through the mirror and kill them. But that means you show Fai what's in your heart Kurogane, if you start lose to your doubts, Fai will shut down completely.' Kurogane growled. 'Why can't it ever be easy? It would be more fun to have a drink together and talk it out.' Tomoyo smiled. 'We are men, we don't talk, we let our fists or swords do the talking for us. Now project your emotions or I'm gonna break the mirror and get out myself.' Kurogane smiled. 'Spoken like a true me.'

Kurogane knew what to do. Well maybe he didn't but his subconscious told him to put his hand on the glass. Tomoyo had disappeared as his reflection and weirdly he mirror didn't seem to reflect him anymore. The moment his hand touched the cold glass he felt a part of him moving, like energy crawling through his hand, making his muscles flex defensively. It didn't hurt him at all. It was more like a part of him, keeping him down, left him. He opened his eyes slowly savoring the lightness of his own heart. Only the feeling of protection and love for Fai were left. He saw himself in the mirror as he clenched his hand to a fist shattering the glass to a million small pieces as he stretched his arm out with all his might. 'Now then…' His reflection said while coming out the frame. 'Let's dance.'

'How do you defeat yourself? How can you fight someone who knows every move you make, anticipates it and counters it the same way you would.' Kurogane thought, his sword pointed above his head ready to strike at whatever his reflection would throw at him.  
'You wondering how to defeat me?' His reflection smirks, striking forwards with his own sword, easily getting blocked by Kurogane pushing him back into his original position. 'Truth be told, I don't know either. You want to talk this out?' He says lowering his sword. Kurogane didn't believe it. 'You're trying to ambush me, you'll have to do better than that.' The other Kurogane hissed. 'Damn that would have been a bit too easy indeed. Oh well, let's just see who is the best improviser then.'

Lashing out at each other, the two men moved in an almost perfect synchronized dance of attack and defending. 'This is getting more boring by the minute.' Reflection-Kurogane said, as he closed his eyes pointing his sword upwards in front of his face. Opening his eyes again, the blade covered itself in flames. 'Flames of vengeance.' He whispered slowly. Lashing out the flames slashing fiery streams at Kurogane.  
'How the hell did you do that?' Kurogane yelled, as he avoided the flaming slashes his reflection threw at him. 'Oh come on, you should know as well, that this sword gets stronger as your emotions get stronger as well. I knew it, so you do as well.'  
'That makes sense, seeing as it transformed into Excalibur when we fought Ashura, damn why haven't I thought about this?' Kurogane grunted cursing himself. So inserting emotions, just like in the mirror? As he closed his eyes, everything faded. It was dangerous, to close them but he had to, to visualizing it. His emotions as a bright light that shone on him. He felt a spark, as he opened his eyes and saw his sword, Excalibur, covered in lightning, jolting and sparking in anticipation. He leaps forward to his reflection, the sword crash against each other. Sparks fly against both man as they push as hard as possible, the impact of the power lunging them across the platform. Kurogane almost falling off the edge and his reflection falling against the side of the empty mirror, as the broken glass cracked under his feet.  
Kurogane regained balance as he shot of lighting to the other man, who leaped up in mid-air to avoid the jolts. 'Missed me asshole.' He smirked at Kurogane, who smiled back at him. 'I wasn't aiming at you fucker.' As the lighting hits the glass fragment, breaking the lightning up into thousands of jolts and reflecting it upwards toward the airborne man. Hitting him hard, making him scream in agony as he slowly fell back down, burned and smoking. This was the moment Kurogane had waited for, as he ran forward screaming 'HAMA RYUUOUJIN!'

'Doubts my ass.' Kurogane said as his reflection dissolved into thin air.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: Imprisonment, the library of the mind **

**Personal ranting**: the last chapter of the adventure in Fai's mind! Anybody still following this? You better because it will rock XD After this chapter a very smexy chapter will probably follow, once my examination are over. –I know I even said I'd stop writing during them but for some reason I can't I love writing to much ^^-

As you might have guessed I based this chapter on some psychological mumbo jumbo. This time I use a metaphor for his mind, I also use the Baddeley's model of working memory, for those with interest in psychology, it is a recentky constructed model that describes how we use our mind to store memories –explained in simple terms :p- Anyway enjoy!

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Bookshelves, row after row, case next to case. As far as Kurogane could see he saw bookshelves. He hated library's, and for whatever reason, the last floor, or room for that matter, had to be one. Even if he looked up, all he could see where bookshelves. The whole room was impressive though, Kurogane had never seen such luxurious looking bookcases, just like the mirror, carved out some exotic wood. The floor had a dark grey color, from the noise he made when walking and the way light reflected from it, he knew it was marble.  
The only problem the tall man had was that the bookcases were like a freaking maze, no order whatsoever. It annoyed him to no end, because there was no way to know if he had been walking around in circles or not. If it wasn't possible to find his own way, there was no way in hell he could find Fai.  
Grunting and swearing loudly he decided to take a look at some books. Immediately two things struck him as odd. The first was how things didn't seem to have any way of particular organization. Old books, dusty and moldy, were standing next to new ones. The second was none of them had a title…  
'Freaking great, really helpful another mindgame.' He muttered to himself, as he reached out to grab an older looking book, with a purple suede cover.  
'Huhum.' Someone couched after him. Kurogane turned around quickly, grabbing the hilt of his sword prepared for whatever threat awaited him there.

A small girl was standing behind him dressed in a maid uniform. 'Please refrain from touching the books.' She said to him on a mechanical tone, making her sound more of a robot then the small child she seemed to be.  
'What are these?' Kurogane grunted, not yet ready to release his sword. The voice the girl had alerted him more then he wanted. 'I do not know, I simply store and file. Occasionally I have to find books as well, it is not an easy task anymore. It was in the beginning however.' She replied, tilting her head, trying to see the bookshelf Kurogane had been looking at, making sure he hadn't messed up the books.  
'What are you doing here anyway?' The ninja asked, although he kind of understood what this was supposed to be. 'I was simply storing and filing, occasionally I have to find books as well.' She replied on the same monotone voice she had been replying the previous time. Kurogane almost lost his patience as he replied. 'Well then what the hell are you?'  
'I am the central executive. I store, file and find books. Are you here for a book perhaps?' The little girl said while walking over to the shelve, picking up a newer looking book. Opening it as she started reading, on a familiar chiming yet sad sounding tone. 'Why do you care for me, Kurogane? Why can't you just not like me.' She closed the book, as she regained her normal voice asking. 'I remember now, are you Kurogane? Have you come to help Fai?'He grunted and nodded his head. 'Do you know where he is?' As the girl shook her head in response. 'I only store, file and find books.'  
Kurogane had enough of this, this girl was getting him nowhere and she was getting him there fast. 'Why are you letting Fai die! You are a part of him, if Fai dies you disappear with him! Don't you care for that?' As the girl remained emotionless with the man's sudden outburst. 'Do you want a book?' Kurogane snorted, he wasn't getting anywhere fast this way. If Fai was here on this floor he would have to find him by himself. But where would he start looking? He hadn't seen the end of the room since he arrived, and he had been walking for hours. He had an idea. 'Can you give me a book about Ashura?' He asked to the girl. 'Affirmative, however it is quite difficult to retrieve.' She replied. 'It is with someone who imprisoned himself with it. Would you like me to take you to that man?' 'Fuck yeah, he can't be worse then you.' Kurogane said while glaring at the small robot, she still made him feel very uncomfortable.

So they walked in silence together. The high heels of the girl making a ticking sound on the grey marble floor, resounding clearly in the giant room. It seemed as if there wasn't a beginning or end, whatever Kurogane tries to use as landmark he still lost his way. The girl suddenly turns around, total silence returning to the library, staring at him for a minute before asking. 'Can you climb?'  
'Like mountains or what?' Kurogane replied, crossing his arms over his chest. 'Affirmative, you need those skills to reach that person and the book you requested.' She said, while pointing him to an opening in between the bookcases. 'Through here, but be aware that you do not have an ocean of time. The longer the stalk gets the more unstable it is. If it grows any longer the cage will fall.' Kurogane had absolutely no idea what she meant by that. 'Yeah, will keep that in mind.'  
Though his sarcasm faded rapidly when he entered the gap between the two bookshelves. It gave way to a relatively small circle-shaped indent in the library. The marble floor in the center of the circle was broken open and through the cracks the roots of a giant stalk had begin to grow. The stalk itself was most likely of a rose. Kurogane thought this because on the stalk thorns about the size and form of a dagger grew. Kurogane looked up in the air trying to where the stalk ended. About halfway he could see a giant leaf growing at the end of a small branch, however it wasn't the leaf that struck his attention. On the branch an old and rusted birdcage was hanging, slowly moving on a non-existing breeze. In the cage he could see a figure of a man, sitting on knees, his arms hanging out the cage as if he had lost all will to live. 'Fai…' Kurogane muttered. As a book fell over the edge of the cage, making the cage tilting the cage dangerously close to the edge of the branch. Time was running out.

The library of Fai's mind, every memory he ever had stored in the form of a book. It was exactly like Hitsuzen had said to Kurogane, Fai was imprisoned in his own mind, literally. Captured in a cage of pain with the memories of Yuui and Ashura, waiting to wither, like the flower he was hanging on. Well if there wasn't time to waste, it seemed he would have to climb his way up. As he walked over to the stalk and grabbed the thorns with his hand, pulling him upwards. The thorns immediately cut open his hands, as he clenched his teeth in pain. Blood slowly dripped from the wounds, but Kurogane refused to give up. Slowly climbing up, he yelled out at the cage.  
'Wake up Fai! I've come to save you!' However no reaction came from the other man. 'I know about your brother, I know about Ashura, what he did. I don't care if you think you are damaged.' At this Fai finally reacted, tilting his head upwards looking at the withering rosebud at the top of the stalk, tears streaming down his pretty face. 'He came for me… Kuro-chi came for me…' He whispered, smiling. As a tear fell to the ground below, slowly reaching down in the soil. 'I want to be saved…'  
Kurogane lost his grip, his hand slippery of the blood gushing out of his wounds. He clenched his hands on the thorns as hard as he could, however it was no use. Everything was covered in blood, enabling him to grab on again. 'Damned.' He yelled in despair, he had come so far to lose now? It can't happen, not like this. 'Fai WAKE UP!' He yelled one more time, as he felt him slipping down. Slowly falling as he tried to clench his nails in the stalk.  
'He wants me to wake up.' Fai muttered, as the rosebud started glowing brightly. Slowly blooming in a beautiful red rose. The cage slowly disappearing as if the light the rose vanquished his prison. As Fai started falling downward, making Kurogane yell out in horror. 'NO!' Jumping out in the air, grabbing on to the blond man, clenching him safely in his arms. As Fai muttered. 'I wanna fly.' Wings immediately sprouting on his back, strong enough to carry them both safely to the floor below. 'Your wounded.' Fai whispers to Kurogane, taking the big man's hands clenching them softly. 'I'm sorry Kurogane.' Making the him twitch, Fai must be serious, he never called him by his full name.  
'I'm not. I would do it again and you know it.' Slowly bending over planting his lips on the blond mans. 'Never fall asleep again.' Kurogane grunted as the library disappeared in the dark.

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'It was about time you two woke up.' Hitsuzen said while putting down his paper looking at Kurogane Fai who slowly opened their eyes not used to sunlight. 'Welcome back Fai, hope Kuro-chi did a good job rescuing you.' He chimed. Kurogane grunted. 'Of course I did, as a sting of pain went through his hands.' He was surprised to find they had been bandaged already.  
'I took the liberty to stitch the wounds.' Hitsuzen said while smiling at Kurogane. 'I changed your underwear to, well I had to… You were asleep for ten days.' He continued, pouting at the images popping back up in his head.  
'You did WHAT?' Kurogane yelled, yet before he could jump out bed to chase after Hitsuzen, who ran away to the door opening of the bus Fai stopped him. 'This might be the last time in a while we are alone, you sure you want to spend it running after Hitsuzen, Kuro-chi?' Kurogane smiled. 'What else should we do then?' He replied getting back on the bed, positioning him on top of Fai. 'I don't know Kuro-daddy, but we're both mature enough to find something right?' The blonde man replied putting his hands around Kurogane's neck.

'Damned they better clean up after themselves, like hell I'm replacing the sheets of the bed.' Hitsuzens sighed, while looking at the slowly rocking bus. Sometimes he was glad only people that needed the bus could see it...

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Thank you for reading! 1000 hits! I feel so proud, and to think I almost stopped writing, thank you fer-hyu and howlingwolf201 and everyone reading!


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